Cheap Skate: Jumbo Shrimp’s Derby Crafts

Some things just go together: peanut butter and jelly, hot days and cold beers, jammers and apex jumps… For Jumbo Shrimp, derby and crafting are such a pair. We asked her a few questions about her practical pastime (and, of course, we got her to show off some of her favorite creations).

Q: How’d you get started crafting? How’d you get started with derby crafts in particular?

I learned to sew in middle school with help from my creative mom. I had pretty weird fashion sense (think Kate Pierson of The B-52’s) in high school, so I made clothes or refashioned many of my questionable thrift store finds. One of my favorites was a skirt I completely covered in multicolored silk flowers. From there I’ve learned to make random things not only as a creative outlet, but also because I hate paying for anything I can make myself. When I started skating, I found a whole new source of inspiration! Especially when it came to making things to teach my toddler daughter about derby.


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March 21, Bout 2

The headline bout between the closely-ranked Atlanta and Jacksonville all-stars lived up to everyone’s high expectations, delivering a real nail-biter, with multiple lead changes and the win up for grabs until the final whistle of the very last jam. As expected, the game turned into a battle pitting DSDG’s legendary defensive blocking against Jacksonville’s deep pool of jammer talent and smart offensive play. Atlanta’s defense delivered, anchored by great teamwork, and fortified by stand-out performances by Switchblade Siouxsie and Madditude Adjustment and a strong showing by rookie Axtual Malice. While New Jax speed-skater/jammer Erin Jackson lived up to her reputation, slipping through walls and covering half the track with three or four impossibly strong strides, Atlanta’s all-stars held her relatively in check and score remained low on both sides. Twenty minutes into the second half, the score was just 43-56 with Jacksonville holding on to a narrow lead. Stand-out jamming by Atlanta rookie Afro Dykee, who alternately juked and powered through Jacksonville defense, supported by the aggressive, blocker-style jamming of Wild Cherri, kept DSDG in the game. A power jam and a series of scoreless jams for Jacksonville allowed Atlanta to whittle away at the New Jax lead, ending the half trailing by just 3 points at 83-80.

Atlanta quickly turned the tables in the second half, putting up a quick 15 points in the first two jams to take a lead of 95-83. Atlanta held onto the lead for much of the second half, but momentum shifted about 10 minutes later with a power jam in New Jax’s favor. Jacksonville then held Atlanta scoreless for a series of jams, taking the lead and extending it to 144-126. Penalties piled up for both teams and there were multiple jams with both teams fielding light packs. For the remainder the half Jacksonville and Atlanta traded points and the lead. DSDG defense continued to deliver, forcing a number of jammer star passes, and New Jax’s stand-out blocker Meow Mix fouled out as the period clock wound down. With 9 seconds left on the game clock, it was a 3-point game. In the final jam, Jacksonville was called for a delay of game after failing to field any blockers, yet despite the short pack from the ensuing penalty Jacksonville’s jammer Krispy Kreme Her got lead and ran out the clock. Jacksonville took the win, 173-170.

MVP blockers were Baller Shot Caller for Atlanta and Atomic Mel-Down for Jacksonville. MVP jammers were Afro Dykee for Atlanta and Erin Jackson for Jacksonville.


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March 21, Bout 1

In their first game of the 2105 season, the Atlanta Rumble Bs put up a decisive win over Jacksonville’s River City Rat Pack in a fast-paced, frenetic bout. Fortified by some outstanding transfers and rookies this season, the Bs came out strong on the first whistle, taking an early lead. Bs blockers and jammers delivered a one-two punch to Jacksonville, with the Bs’ new, highly mobile defensive formation shutting down the Rat Pack jammers on the starts, giving the strong Atlanta jammers the opportunity to gain lead time after time. With the exception of a few power jams, Atlanta scores per jam remained fairly moderate, as Rat Pack jammers would finally escape Atlanta blockers after the Bs jammers had a chance to make one or two passes. But the Bs’ high percentage of winning lead and their defense on power jams took a steady toll, and the half ended with the Bs in leading,123-35.

The Rat Pack came back from halftime with some fire, tightening their defensive walls and pouring on the offense. A series of lead jammer calls went Jacksonville’s way, and they began to chip away at the Atlanta lead. But in spite of the heavy offensive fire, Bs defense remained strong. Even as Rat Pack blockers disrupted Atlanta’s defense, the one-on-one blocking skills of individual Bs skaters and the team’s relentless defensive recycling to the front of the pack allowed Atlanta to hold on to the lead and wear down the Jacksonville jammers. By the middle of the second half, Rat Pack jammers were visibly tired, and opportunities to convert their few power jams to big scores were squashed by the Bs. Scoring differentials per jam began to widen in the Bs’ favor, allowing the Rumble Bs to run away with the game. At the final whistle, the Bs had outscored Jacksonville’s Rat Pack 3-1. The final score was 297-97.

MVP blockers were Souljourner for the Rumble Bs and Tera Bites for the Rat Pack. MVP jammers were The Boss for the Rumble Bs and Naughty Nesha for the Rat Pack.


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It’s about to get hot: preview this Saturday’s bout!


This Saturday, March 21st, will be the day of our first interleague bouts of the 2015 season! Get ready to cheer on your Atlanta Rollergirls as they take on two travel teams from the Jacksonville Rollergirls.

Bout 1: Rumble Bs -vs- River City Rat Pack

Courtesy of Jacksonville Rollergirls

Courtesy of Jacksonville Rollergirls

Buzz, Buzz the Rumble Bs are back, here to defend their undefeated title against the Jacksonville Rollergirls’ River City Rat Pack. Last season we saw the Bs win against two Tennessee teams, Knoxville and Nashville. Today, they are looking to expand their interstate wins into Florida.

 Keep an eye out for transfers AmsterDAM, Maul E. Cule and Souljourner, as well as past Jukes of Hazzard players Brick and Helga G. Pa-Smack-I as they take to the track for their first game with the Rumble Bs. Their strength and agility will pair well with the seasoned stylings of skaters like Hate Ashbury, Nutella Ferrero, and Totalitifiian, this season’s Rumble Bs Captains. The River City Rat Pack may swarm the walls, but watch out fans, it’s about to get hot in this derby kitchen.

Bout 2:  Dirty South Derby Girls -vs- New Jax City Rollers

Courtesy of Jacksonville Rollergirls

Courtesy of Jacksonville Rollergirls

Currently ranked 13th in the world, Atlanta’s all-star Dirty South Derby Girls will go head to head against the WFTDA 15th ranked team, New Jax City Rollers from Jacksonville, FL. It’s DSDG’s first game of the season and they are looking to open big. After a disappointing Round 3 knockout in last year’s WFTDA International Playoffs, DSDG has their focus on victory so they can travel to the WFTDA International Championships again this season. The outcome of this game could determine a move in rankings on either side, so both of these teams will leave their best game on the track. Walls will be un-moveable, jammers will be unstoppable. This win could be the beginning of the road to Champs for either team, so fans, you better strap in for a serious match-up.

Don’t have tickets? Don’t worry, you still have a chance to catch the action! Tickets are available online or in person at Powerhouse Skates. Be sure to get them before they sell out!


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Derby Wives Forevah: Nutella + NME

If you came to this year’s Debutante Brawl, then you saw our very own Bat L. Royale perform a sacred and beautiful ceremony: the derby marriage. But what does it really mean to be derby wives? We asked Nutella Ferrero and NME, two skaters who tied the knot in 2013, about their derby marriage.



NME and I met when we were both going through a fall skate workshop in 2011 (think of it as pre-Rec League) for ARG. It was under the tutelage of Tanya Hyde and Coach Jim Blair with guest appearances by Demi Gore from time to time.

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Derby 101: Direction of Gameplay

Are you new to derby or just looking to brush up on your rulebook skills? Wayne Mooney is your man! This week, he’ll explain direction of gameplay penalties.

Photo: O-Jen Ishii Photography

Recently the media has been filled with stories of scientists’ discovery that rollergirls’ vision, like that of Jurassic Park’s mighty part-frog Tyrannosaurus rex, is based on movement. (Despite persistent rumors, however, only a very small percentage of rollergirls were found to actually contain any significant amount of frog DNA.) Since this news broke, I’ve seen no end of people suggesting that rollergirls should hold still on the track in order to avoid being seen, and while the surprise attacks would be an excellent strategy, the fact is that rollergirls were aware of this handicap long before science turned its stethoscopes and Geiger counters toward our sport, and they wrote rules prohibiting exactly such a play.


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February 21, Bout 2

The second game of the season-opening doubleheader matched the brand new Denim Demons against the brand new Toxic Shocks. Both teams are anchored by Team USA all-stars, with Wild Cherri returning to the Demons and transfer Baller Shot Caller joining the Toxic Shocks, and both lived up to their reputations by delivering some spectacularly showy blocks during this bout. The Demons, skating without their Captain Nattie Longlegs who was ill, took off to an early but narrow lead. A Shocks jammer penalty in the 7th jam gave Demons jammer Choke Cherry an opportunity to extend a 20-19 score to a 35-23 Demons advantage. Lighting-fast and powerful defense by Wild Cherri coupled by some well-timed offense by Totalitiffian helped the Demons hold on to lead for most of the first half, but the Shocks slowly chipped away at the margin. An unanswered 9 points by Shocks jammer Nora Gretz in the 16th jam brought Shocks within one point and the momentum decidedly shifted. Shocks jammers Afro Dykee, Nora Gretz, and Genie in a Battle turned three consecutive lead-jammer calls and a power jam into an unanswered 37 points. The half ended 61 Demons- 97 Shocks.

The second half began with a Shocks power jam, giving them a chance to extend the lead to 61-112. Shocks and Demons jammers traded leads at a fairly equal rate in the first half of the second period, but awesome Shocks defense anchored by Baller Shot Caller and offense by Ozzie Kamikaze prevented the Demons from converting lead jammer status into the points they needed. A Demons jammer penalty in the 4th jam gave Shocks Jammer Afro Dykee a chance to put up a cool 15 points, then the Shocks held the Demons scoreless for five consecutive jams and extended their lead to an almost insurmountable 157-73. The Demons rallied about midway through the second half with a series of lead jam calls, allowing them to match the Shocks point-for-point in jams 9-14, but they could not close the gap in the score. The Shocks were consistently able to do more with their leads and pack advantages, outscoring the Demons about 2 to 1, and they steadily pulled further away. The final score was 226 Shocks – 113 Demons.

MVP blockers were Helga G. Pa-Smack-i for the Demons and Baller Shot Caller for the Shocks; MVP jammers were Nutella Ferraro for the Denim Demons and Afro Dykee for Toxic Shocks.


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February 21, Bout 1

New year, new teams! The 2015 season opener pitted the brand new Apocalypstix against the brand new Sake Tuyas in a nail-biter of a bout with the win up for grabs until the very last jam. The Sakes took off to a quick lead, until a power jam gave Stix jammer Trouble MakeHer a quick 10 points and the first lead change. It was a close back-and-forth for a while, but Sakes defensive walls anchored by all-stars Switchblade Siouxsie and Rudy Huxtabrawl held tight, allowing the Sakes to slowly extend their lead. Another power jam coupled with Stix blocker penalties opened up the first significant lead, Sakes 51- Stix 30. Then Trouble Makeher came to town, in back-to-back jams against light Sakes packs, laying on 17 and 18 points for another lead change. 72-69. But it didn’t last. Stix jammer penalties gave Sakes jammer The Boss an opportunity to take the Sakes back to a 93-72 lead. The half ended 102-72.

The Stix came back in the second half with a formidable all-star jammer rotation of just Trouble and Slams McKenzie, bolstered by Stix blockers Queen Loseyateefa and Madditude Adjustment, who stayed on the track jam after jam after jam. The score remained close until the Sakes handed Trouble a power jam with a light Sakes pack, giving her an opportunity to score 28 points and cut the Sakes lead to 146-122. The margin stayed close until a seemingly beautiful apex jump by Sakes Jammer The Boss turned into a track cut on official review, and Trouble put up the points to close the Sakes lead to just six points, 170-164. The Sakes answered back with three straight leads, entering the final jam, 197-168. That margin was hardly safe though. In a thrilling final jam. Sakes got lead but both jammers went to the box, giving their teams a chance to trade off points for a full two-minute jam that finished in a Sakes win, 197-181.

MVP blockers were Switchblade Siouxsie for the Sake Tuyas and Queen Loseyateefa for the Apocalypstix; MVP Jammers were Souljourner for Sake Tuyas and Trouble MakeHer for the Apocalypstix.


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Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me As Fresh Meat

Photo: Tim Moxley

Calling all prospective rollergirls: mid-season tryouts are just around the corner! That means that this Saturday, we’ll have a brand-new class of fresh meat. This is an exciting time for any new skater, but also a daunting one. What should fresh meaties know before they strap on skates for their first practice? Toxic Shocks co-captain and DSDG skater Lez Dispenser has some words of wisdom.

So you passed your initial tryouts and made the latest meat class. Congratulations! This is where I tell you, “Now the real work begins.” It does. Unfortunately, that may be the extent of the warning you’ll get from most rollergirls. As of yet, there is no published guide to meatdom. Here are some tips, however, that I wish someone told me as a meat:


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Get Excited for Saturday: Bout Preview

February 21st (that’s this Saturday!) kicks off the Atlanta Rollergirls’ 11th season, and if you hadn’t noticed, ARG’s home teams have been re-drafted. That’s right, the Apocalypstix, Denim Demons, Sake Tuyas, and Toxic Shocks are beginning the season fresh and ready to climb their way to the top. This means you will witness the FIRST game these skaters play with their new teammates, and you will experience the beginning of the Atlanta Rollergirls home team saga.

Winter training is over, and now the Apocalypstix and Sake Tuyas turn up the heat for the season opener. Last season we saw these teams face off twice, the Sakes winning the first round and the Stix winning the second, but all has changed. Since re-drafting, each team is starting with a clean record. Who will be the first to taste victory?

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