Photo: Paducah August Photography
Are you new to derby or just looking to brush up on your rulebook skills? Wayne Mooney is your man! This week he takes on the elusive Jammer Penalty Swap…
There’s a widely recognized phenomenon where a jammer in the penalty box leaves just as the other jammer arrives. The reason for this is simple: jammers, by their very nature are flighty, energetic creatures. They are social butterflies, albeit ones who prefer hip-checks to more traditional forms of pleasantry. Trapped in the penalty box, a jammer finds herself unable to flit, dart, or whiz. She finds that zipping anywhere is incredible difficult, and that dashing is right out. Deprived of her usual methods of amusing herself, she is left with nothing to do but contemplate reality, and quickly finds herself contemplating the nature of reality. “How,” she wonders aloud, “can I be certain anything exists at all? How can I know that I’m not imagining all of this?” (more…)
We have brand-spanking-new teammates, and we’re ready to show them to the world! You may have already glimpsed these ladies from afar if you’ve been to any of our home bouts recently. (They’ve been racking up MVPs all over the place!) But wouldn’t it be great to meet them in person? You can! Come out to our Deb Brawl next Tuesday night at Argosy and schmooze not only with our newest players, but also with the rest of your Atlanta Rollergirls! And just so you know for whom to buy a celebratory drink, here are some brief introductions. (more…)
Fans stayed on their feet for this hometown showdown. With the taste of last season’s powerful win still on their tongues, the Demon’s came wanting more, but the Stix put up a venemous fight, proving they were not so easy to take down. Lead changes were regular, and every push the Demons gave, the Stix answered back, keeping the score to a close 112 – Demons, 103 – Stix at the half.
The second half was just as exciting as the first, and it was obvious both of these hometeams came to win. There were lead changes and star passes, big hits and fancy feet. Defense on both sides was fierce. Each jammer had to fight, push and juke their way through rock hard walls, only to be faced with blockers recycling them back into the pack almost every turn. In the last minutes, the Stix were up, and victory was in their grasps, until All Star blocker Queen Loseyateefa did was she does best, and drew a cut track penalty on the Stix’s jammer. Even though the Stix fought to the bitter end, with The Boss sneaking their last four points in at the final whistle, jammer penalties were the Stix’s downfall, and the Demons came through for the win with an official final score of Demons – 224, Stix – 184.
Jammer MVP – Afro Dykee
Blocker MVP – Lez Dispenser
Jammer MVP – Slams McKenzie
Blocker MVP – Rudy Huxtabrawl
Dirty South Derby Girls vs. Naptown Roller Girls
Final Score: Dirty South 221 — Naptown 72
The Dirty South Derby Girls showed their unstoppable steam engine like quality again June 12 against the Naptown Roller Girls. It was 0 – 0 after the first jam, and Naptown struck first in the second with a two point nudge, but after a jammer penalty in the third, Dirty South’s Bruze Orman took hold of the lead with a 20 point jam. Bruze’s strong jam proved to be the steam Dirty South needed for take off, and after a tenacious fight from Naptown, the first half ended 126 – Dirty South, 38 – Naptown.
The Dirty South kept gathering momentum in the second half with unbreakable walls and jammers pushing full steam ahead. Jammunition, or Grand Slam Jam as the fans call her, proved her name once again the second half with several grand slams, and Jean Juke Piccard put those facy feet to good use, juking around Naptown’s hard hitters like Asian Sinsation and Mutant Jean. Naptown’s Maiden America and G-Rocket answered back, putting points on the board, but Dirty South’s renouned defense held strong, smooth and together, for an official final score of Dirty South – 221, Naptown – 72.
Dirty South MVPs
Jammer MVP – Jammunition
Blocker MVP – Ozzie Kamikaze
Jammer MVP – Maiden America
Blocker MVP – Asian Sinsation
Photo: Polly Ryncarz
Third time’s a charm! On Saturday June 28, I participated in my 3rd powerlifting meet at the 2nd Annual Powerlifting for Pink hosted by CrossFit Chattahoochee to benefit Paint Georgia Pink. Powerlifting is is a strength sport that consists of three attempts at maximal weight on three lifts: back squat, bench press, and deadlift. This is my third meet and by far my most successful. It was a good day. A very, very good day. I successfully completed 8 out of 9 lifts and hit three personal records: 115kg (253#) squat, 70kg (154#) bench press, 145kg (319#) deadlift for a total of 330kg (726#) earning me two medals and the Best Master Female Lifter of the meet. (more…)
Toxic Shocks vs. Sake Tuyas
Final Score: Shocks 269 – Sakes 138
Having lost several of their mainstay players, the Sake Tuyas put up a fight before falling to the Toxic Shocks on June 14. The Sakes were expecting a tough bout, and with the absence of Agent Maulder, Hollicidal and the Merchant of Menace, the Shocks capitalized and brought home the win.
With all-star jammers Jean-Juke Picard, Trouble MakeHer and Jammunition, the game started out strong for the Shocks. The Sake walls were unable to hold all those fancy feet, and the score at the half was Shocks 166 – Sakes 57.
The Sakes regrouped during halftime, and proved that teamwork is the MVP in any game. With walls led by captain Amelia Scareheart and ICU Dead, the Sakes sent in jammers wrecking ball Woah Nellie, agile Wheelin’ Jennings and tenacious Fullatrix LeStrange who grabbed points 4 and 5 at a time. During the jams where the Sake walls stayed tight, they began making a comeback, but the expert blocking by Scout SnipeHer and Rebel Yellow shut down several scoring runs, and the Shocks pulled out the win.
Jammer MVP- Elle A. Driveby
Blocker MVP- Alassin Sane
Jammer MVP- Wheelin’ Jennings
Blocker MVP- Shannanigan
Dirty South Derby Girls vs. Arch Rival Rollergirls All-Stars
Final Score: DSDG 250 – ARRG 67
Although the score was heavily in favor of the Dirty South Derby Girls (DSDG), the Arch Rival Rollergirls (ARRG) brought a fast, physical game to Atlanta on June 14. Hot off the whistle, ARRG’s jammer Brickyard put the first points on the board, but DSDG’s Bruze Orman answered with 8. DSDG mobilized their defensive walls, and blocking superstar Queen Loseyateefa was a stabilizing force throughout the game. DSDG increased their lead by about 100 points, with jamming by DSDG rookie and high scorer of the first half ChokeCherry and Jammunition.
The points for DSDG just kept on coming. ARRG got into trouble when they weren’t able to switch from offense to defense fast enough. DSDG walls were solid, so ARRG would hit with quick offense, but weren’t able to mobilize their walls fast enough to stop DSDG jammers, resulting in grand slam after grand slam for DSDG. Hard, solid walls left no hope for ARRG to sneak in any points. The final score was DSDG 250, ARRG 67.
Jammer MVP- Mighty Mighty boston
Blocker MVP- Party Foul
Jammer MVP- Belle of the Brawl
Blocker MVP- Queen Loseyateefa
The Atlanta Rollergirls present the 31 Day Leg Challenge!
Challenge yourself and conquer the grueling 31 days of intense leg workouts from your favorite rollergirls! The challenge consists of 30-31 leg workout repetitions for 31 consecutive days. Do you have what it takes? We believe in you, so join us and let’s complete this challenge together! (more…)
“Unity is strength. . . when there is teamwork and collaboration, wonderful things can be achieved.” –Mattie Stepanek
I am extremely proud to be a skater for the Atlanta Rollergirls, especially after a weekend like this past one at East Coast Derby Extravaganza in Philadelphia. ECDX 2014 was a very memorable experience. I can say with assurance that Atlanta was a standout team in more ways than one. Last week, our All-Stars, the Dirty South Derby Girls (DSDG), and our B team, the Rumble Bs, boarded planes to Philadelphia, PA, crammed themselves into rental cars and joined top roller derby teams from all over the world to participate at ECDX. Both Atlanta Rollergirls travel teams faced their most challenging opponents this season. The major highlights consisted of DSDG taking on Philly and Gotham, the Rumble Bs facing Philly’s B team, and Wild Cherri and Nattie Long Legs lining up against each other in Team USA vs Team Canada.
Are you new to derby or just looking to brush up on the rules? Wayne Mooney is your man! We’ll be hearing more of his unique take on the WFTDA rulebook in the coming months. To start, he explains how to tell if you’re a failure (at reforming the pack.)
Since finding a spider in my bed last month, I’ve decided never to sleep again. I’m glad I did, because after staying awake for two weeks straight, I had a terrifying vision of the future. Rampant movie piracy will cause the complete collapse of the global entertainment industry. To alleviate their boredom, humankind will turn to the only form of entertainment remaining: head-to-head peanut butter and jelly sandwich making. Two competitors armed with butter knives will simultaneously attempt to spread a quantity of their assigned condiment onto the same slice of bread, each carefully balancing their efforts between spreading their condiment and blocking their opponent from doing the same. Sadly, there’s no stopping this horrible yet delicious future, but at least it provides a convenient metaphor to explain the reasons behind derby’s failure to reform penalty. (more…)